


Figure of My Dream(s)

by anon_nim, doitall



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-27
Updated: 2017-02-27
Packaged: 2018-09-26 12:23:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9896279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anon_nim/pseuds/anon_nim, https://archiveofourown.org/users/doitall/pseuds/doitall
Summary: When Chanyeol gone, Kyungsoo keeps wondering in and out of love.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Written for do-itall fic fest (Prompt #153)
> 
> Author's Note: I sincerely thank the mod, who've been working hard and full of patience and understanding. Love for my beta, Mel because she's been polishing this story in short amount of time. Last but not least, prompter and anyone who read this, enjoy~!

Prologue.  
  
“It's in one of those boxes, just search for it.” Seungsoo's voice sound so different on the phone, he thinks.  
  
“If I recall correctly, there's a lot of boxes there, hyung!”  
  
“That's why I told you to search for it, starting now.”  
  
Kyungsoo grunts, considering backing down and just turning off his phone for the rest of the day. But he's a decent human being. That, and he's got nothing to do anyway. “I hate you.”  
  
“Well, I love you too!” Seungsoo sounds distracted for a minute before he comes on the line again, “Okay, Soo, my plane will land in the airport eight hours from now, I hope you've found my super duper precious camera by that time. And that you will be waiting for me at the airport because I can't wait for too long, I have to keep going.”  
  
“Then why are you stopping here anyway.”  
  
“It's called transit; I thought you were the smarter one here? Anyway, I really need that camera, and I need to go, like, right now. Bye, Soo. See you later.”  
  
The phone call ends before he can answer. He grunts again for good measure before finally walking into the attic. He stares for some time, wondering if he should call in Joonmyun-the-neighbor to help him. Not because he's afraid, of course, just so he can find it quicker.  
  
But then he decides against it, he remembers Joonmyun has Tao over to study. Really, what's wrong with people who studying in the holidays? They just graduated from middle school, high school things can wait, right?  
  
He steps carefully, the stairs are old, and he fell from these stair once when he was child. It's still fresh in his mind, thank you very much. The attic looks a little scary; with light coming in from only one window, making everything look suspiciously like they have long demonic shadows. He's a little disoriented, before finally locating the light switch and flicking it on.  
  
With light illuminating it, the attic looks much more normal and messy - not that he's scared in the first place of course. It looks like a war zone, to be honest. Everything lying haphazardly around the wooden floor, while some books and smaller boxes are placed on the shelves. The dust is five inches thick and there are spider webs everywhere.  
  
He sighs and muses out loud, trying to guess where the camera would be without actually searching for it in every corner of the attic.  
  
“Okay, so..” He walks in circle, “Hm.. if I were Seungsoo, where would I put my super duper precious camera in this dusty attic?”  
  
No answer. Of course. But he keeps talking anyway, “Those boxes look too old, it can't be there, right?”  
  
Kyungsoo sneezes for quite a few times, poking through the old things and trying not to touch it at the same time. He's still circling the damage zone, eyes looking intently at everything that shines when he sees the box.  
  
A weird box painted with green, sits on the floor labeled 'I wouldn't touch it if I were you!', which makes him kneel and open it rather than leave it. It's Seungsoo's. There's a trophy in it, medals, and his photo album – the photos from his school day. There are some action figures too, but the camera is not there. Kyungsoo chuckles before deciding to leave it be and focus on his task.  
  
“It's a camera, Soo. Okay. So, will it be in those shelves? It must be, no way is he leaving it on the floor. Why did he leave it here in the first place?”  
  
So he stands and starts searching at the sides, rummaging in the boxes on the shelves. It takes a few tries, but he finally finds the bag – it's in a bag, not box like what Seungsoo said, what a jerk –, and places it around his neck.  
  
He opens it, just to be sure, and the sleek black camera is there and hey, there's the charger too! Kyungsoo smiles triumphantly at his success and nods, ready to set off and flee from this not so dusty attic anymore (somehow the dust gets less thick every time he sneezes, it must be magic).  
  
“Well, goodbye. I'll see you ten years later,” He smirks.  
  
  
  
2009  
  
It turns out ten years later means tomorrow afternoon. Kyungsoo is sick of watching television all day long and has nothing to do. Home Alone turns out to be very boring and un-educational for him. His parents won't be back for another week and the neighborhood is quiet because everybody has gone on vacation. After his quick trip to the attic, he thought it wouldn't hurt to visit again, doing something productive along the way. So up he goes, armed with a broom and duster.  
  
“I can't believe I did this,” He says for the umpteenth time, the boxes lined and stacked neatly. “At least this room doesn't look like it has been hit by earthquake anymore.”  
  
He thinks it might be loneliness that makes him talk for hours to nobody in particular.  
  
“It's getting lonely,” He sighs.  
  
He is currently sweeping the spider webs on the ceiling when he finally sees it. Something sparkling in the farthest corner, near the window. Without actually meaning to, he approaches the object in question. It's on the tallest shelf, cushioned with carved wood, sparkling white, pristine and all.  
  
A glass ball.  
  
He squints to get a better look, it’s like what those gypsies and fortune tellers use. He struggles to reach the glass ball, tiptoeing before finally his hands met a cold surface, he quickly grabs it –  
  
And slips.  
  
He lands on his back with a loud thump, with the glass ball following right after, crashing to the floor and shattering into pieces. He stares dumbly, not processing what happened yet but he’s still pretty sure there are some scratches on his leg – because it stings. He screams too, loud and echoing through the empty house. But he has no time to dwell on it, because from the shattered glass ball –  
  
“Achoo!”  
  
–a tall person with fluffy brown hair emerges with a sneeze, before looking at him with a dazed look. “Hey, are you okay?”  
  
Kyungsoo whimpers. He vaguely sees the person takes a step closer.  
  
And then everything goes black.  
  
  
  
Kyungsoo wakes up with a sudden hit of a headache, wondering where he is and when he fell asleep, when a glass of water comes into the corner of his vision. He takes it gratefully and realizes a second too late that he’s not alone. The stranger smiles, and Kyungsoo’s pretty sure he could count all his teeth if he wanted to.  
  
“Hey, I asked you this before, but you blacked out on me. Are you feeling okay?”  
  
He wants to yells ‘no’ to this stranger face because he freaks him out. Or yell for help, maybe Joonmyun would come and save him. For extreme measure, he considers calling the police. But he just blinks. And keeps silent.  
  
“Okay, you’re freaking me out, and your leg is bleeding. May I know where the first aid kit is?”  
  
Kyungsoo points to the drawer in the corner.  
  
The stranger walks away and comes back a second later, the first aid kit in his hands. He kneels and starts applying antiseptic on to Kyungsoo’s leg almost immediately. Kyungsoo watches intently and answers with clipped tones to all his questions. All along trying to summarize what has happened to him in the past few hours.  
  
While cleaning his attic Kyungsoo found a glass ball. He accidentally drops it and as soon as it shatters, a person appears. A person with boyish smile and long arms (and legs) which he is currently having a conversation with. In his living room, like a normal civilian. Maybe he’s finally gone crazy in this quiet environment.  
  
“So, your only brother is a travel-around-the-world photographer and your parents are gone on their second honeymoon, leaving you here all alone?”  
  
Dazed, he nods.  
  
“Wow, you must be pretty brave, huh?”  
  
He doesn't know about that, but nodding anyway. “I guess.”  
  
“You seem pretty cool about me intruding in here and all.”  
  
Kyungsoo starts, but doesn’t know how to respond.  
  
“All done!” The stranger grins, “Hey, can I get some water, too? If you don't mind, that's it.”  
  
“It's okay.” He squawks. “Just– you know where the kitchen is.”  
  
Stranger nods. “Yup, thank you though.”  
  
When the stranger comes back from the kitchen, smiling at him, Kyungsoo's mind is still reeling. But he takes a deep breath and says, “Who are you?”  
  
Stranger blinks. He seems to be thinking so hard about the answer to that simple question that Kyungsoo almost feels bad. “Me? I'm.. Chanyeol?” He asks. “Park Chanyeol. Yes, that's me.”  
  
Kyungsoo glances at the clock; it's almost time for supper. “So Park Chanyeol, can you tell me how or why – “ He trails off.  
  
Because when he looks up, Park Chanyeol is gone.  
  
  
  
Kyungsoo goes to the attic the next day, when the sun is still shining brightly and he has nothing to be afraid of. He’s half expecting Chanyeol to show up when he flicks the light on but there’s no one in the attic. Instead, he finds the glass ball – the very one he broke yesterday – sitting contently on it’s carved wood. Not a scratch to be found. And no sign of Park Chanyeol anywhere.  
  
He bites his bottom lip. “This is crazy. I’m going crazy.”  
  
But the scratch on his leg is real. And on a whim, he grabs the glass ball and takes it to the safety of his bedroom (this time he uses a stool instead tiptoeing, just to be safe). He inspects the glass ball quietly before giving up and placing it on the desk near his bed.  
  
He doesn’t realize that he’s fallen asleep.  
  
When he wakes up, it’s cold. Kyungsoo mumbles something incoherent and shivers slightly before he hears someone chuckle.  
  
“You talk in your sleep, that’s cute.”  
  
And Kyungsoo’s heart starts thumping furiously while his brain tries to become more alert. Because that’s Park Chanyeol's voice talking to him, in his bedroom (and he’s not cute, mind you). But then, a blanket is spread over him, and he’s tucked to bed with gentle movements.  
  
Kyungsoo yawns.  
  
When he wakes up again, he’s all on his own.  
  
  
  
Chanyeol quickly becomes a constant figure in Kyungsoo's life and Kyungsoo learns to stop asking about his existence - or his method of coming and going. It doesn't stop him asking about the other things though.  
  
“How old are you?”  
  
“Mm..same as you I guess.”  
  
“Do you like to sing?”  
  
“Why?”  
  
“Your voice kinda nice and if you like to sing, we can make duet!”  
  
“Oh! That's cool! I love singing and I can play guitar, too!”  
  
And that's how they travel up to the attic hand in hand in search for Seungsoo's missing guitar. And true to his word, Chanyeol plays the guitar for them, deep voice harmonizing perfectly with Kyungsoo's own.  
  
“Chanyeol, don't you think I'm too old for imaginary friend?”  
  
Chanyeol laughed a little before he answers, “You are!”  
  
“It is not funny!”  
  
“I'm sorry,” Chanyeol says after he finished laughing his head off. “But don't worry, Soo. I'm here, you won't need imaginary friend anymore.”  
  
That night, Kyungsoo sleeps with Chanyeol limbs tangled with his own.  
  
  
  
2010  
  
Kyungsoo’s watching Prince of Tennis in the couch, with Chanyeol’s head resting comfortably in his lap – Chanyeol had dyed his hair red this time. He strokes the taller’s hair unconsciously, his other hand busy stuffing his favorite nachos into his mouth. Chanyeol must be asleep right now; he never likes sitting in one place or doing nothing, always constantly moving. Watching anime is another form of torture to him, but he relents anyway. Always allowing Kyungsoo do what he wants.  
  
He’s at the middle of the last episode when there’s distinct sound of the front door and he freezes. A second later, a voice booms through the house; “I’m home!” And Seungsoo emerges from the hallway.  
  
Kyungsoo grins, but otherwise doesn’t move. Careful to not jostle Chanyeol from his sleep, even though his brother wouldn’t see him either way. He can’t suppress the happy laugh though, smiling openly at Seungsoo.  
  
“You’re back! Welcome home!”  
  
“Hey, Soo! I can’t wait to–” Seungsoo halts his speech and stops moving altogether. “Who is that?”  
  
“What? Who?”  
  
“That boy in your lap.”  
  
Kyungsoo blinks. “What boy in my lap?”  
  
“Are you being serious right now? That. Boy. In. Your. Lap.”  
  
Wait. “You can see him?!” Like, what?  
  
“He’s big and his hair is _red_! What do you expect?! And you’re the one with astigmatism, not me!”  
  
“What?! Chanyeol!”  
  
“Who’s Chanyeol?!”  
  
“He’s Chanyeol!”  
  
They stare at each other. Kyungsoo is amazed because Chanyeol doesn’t even stir through the whole commotion. Seungsoo starts to think that maybe it’s not safe to leave his baby brother all alone in their little house. Chanyeol only snores.  
  
“Do I even want to ask what you guys are up to?”  
  
“He’s a friend of mine?”  
  
Seungsoo breaths, “Okay, that’s acceptable. I’m just going to sleep in my room and never wake up, how’s that sound?”  
  
“Sounds sad.” Seungsoo doesn’t reply, half running to his bedroom, mumbling all along the way. Kyungsoo giggles quietly, “So.. Chanyeol, you’re real, huh?”  
  
  
  
Kyungsoo has a chance to try his luck the next weekend. Tao is screaming Kyungsoo's name outside, rapidly knocking on the front door as well. Before he opens the door, Kyungsoo tells Chanyeol to behave and stay quiet and still in his bedroom.  
  
“Hey.. Tao -”  
  
Tao's mouth twitches. “Who's that?”  
  
“Huh?”  
  
“I hear someone playing a guitar, hyung! Don't you leave alone?”  
  
There's two ways for Kyungsoo play this out, a) pretend that he doesn't hear a thing or b) drag Tao to the bedroom to ask if he sees anything? Is it a flying guitar or a redhead boy with stupid toothy smile?  
  
Kyungsoo visibly gulps. “You hear that, too?”  
  
“Yes? Hyung!” He ushers Tao inside while the boy clings to him and whines. “I'm scared, is it a ghost?!”  
  
When Kyungsoo finally opens his bedroom door with Tao crying in his arms, Chanyeol blinks at them.  
Chanyeol's flapping hand knocks the table and makes the man cringes awkwardly, Tao stops crying.  
  
“Who is that?" Tao asks Kyungsoo before facing Chanyeol head on, "Who are you?”  
  
“I'm Chanyeol. And you are?”  
  
“My name is Huang Zitao but just Tao is fine.”  
  
“Hello just Tao.”  
  
By the time Tao leaves the house, Chanyeol has gained another friend.  
  
“I'll bring the other guys next time! See you hyungs!”  
  
Chanyeol waves back in vigor. “Bye, Tao!”  
  
Kyungsoo feels conflicted.  
  
  
  
“Stop it, Chanyeol. I might chop your hand by accident if you don't.”  
  
“Hey!” Chanyeol pouts. “That's... rude.”  
  
But Chanyeol doesn't make any real attempts to move, still hugging Kyungsoo's back, chin resting on the slope of his collarbone – watching the smaller man cook. Kyungsoo squirms, trying to get loose from Chanyeol's caging arms.  
  
“For god’s sake, Yeol! Are you a koala? Stop clinging to me!”  
  
“I'm not clinging to you! It's called back hug, Soo,” Chanyeol whines.  
  
“Whatever. Look, I'm not really sure how is this dish gonna taste–”  
  
“Amazing! I bet it taste amazing. “  
  
He snorts. But otherwise he doesn't make a fuss again, he lets Chanyeol cling, following him every time he moves to grabs some ingredients. It feels comfortable.  
  
Wait, it's not _that_ comfortable, Chanyeol is still restricting his movement, but its kinda tolerable. It sounds weird. Is this what Tao said? What is it? Domesticated? Where did that boy learn that word anyway?  
  
The table is already set when there's a series of knocks on his front door. Kyungsoo quickly scrambles to open the door, casting a smile at Chanyeol. He sees Joonmyun arrive with Tao and Minseok in tow. There's another man behind Minseok – his features soft and delicate, eyes glinting –, which he assumes must be Lu Han.  
  
“Come on in,” he ushers.  
  
“Okay!” Tao shrieks before he pushes Kyungsoo aside and screams, “Chanyeol–hyung!”  
  
Kyungsoo hopes Chanyeol wouldn't vanish before his eyes.  
  
  
  
They sit around the table, munching on spaghetti when Joonmyun speaks, “So.. you’re Chanyeol.”  
  
Chanyeol turns from his heated conversation with Tao. “Yes, I am. And you must be Joonmyun-ssi. Kyungsoo said you're like a mother hen that’s constantly worrying about them.”  
  
Joonmyun seems taken aback. “Did he now?”  
  
“And what about me?” Tao pipes in.  
  
“He said you're a scaredy cat but you know wushu to save your life?”  
  
“Hey!”  
  
Kyungsoo only snorts, “Don't worry, that was before. I have better words to describe you right now.”  
  
“Which is?”  
  
“Kungfu Panda.”  
  
“HEY!”  
  
Chanyeol giggles.  
  
“Shut up, Puppy Boy!”  
  
The rest of the evening passes in a blurry scene. He feels content though, with how fast everyone warming up to Chanyeol and his antics. He can't seem to look away from Chanyeol either, not when his eyes are twinkling crescent shapes, his mouth grinning excitedly and using a big hand gestures to support his story. Once in awhile Chanyeol will glance at him and they will wear matching grins.  
  
“This is actually pretty good.” Lu Han says.  
  
“It's called Kimchi Spaghetti,” Chanyeol supplies.  
  
“Chanyeol had the crazy idea to mix them up and swore on his life that it would taste fantastic.”  
  
“It really is.” Five voice reply in unison which makes them all laugh.  
  
“So all this time, when we thought you're grounded for a lifetime, you were with Chanyeol?”  
  
Kyungsoo jerks his attention to Minseok, smiling sheepishly. “I'm sorry, hyung. It's just, I can't meet Chanyeol anytime I want.”  
  
Minseok raises his eyebrows but doesn't press further. Instead, it's Lu Han who answers him. “He's nice, and you're happy. I guess that settles everything.”  
  
Kyungsoo smiles so wide for the rest of the day. It’s no use to keep questioning Chanyeol - although he can't help but wonder - and take this all as reality. Even if Chanyeol can emerge from thin air and vanish in the blink of an eye, Chanyeol is real.  
  
Chanyeol is here.  
  
  
  
2011  
  
“I really like you, hyung.”  
  
Kyungsoo grimaces. He likes Jongin, really. He’s a nice, sweet kid, always caring and considerate towards him. But Kyungsoo doesn’t like like Jongin, no. Not in that way, at least. And it really breaks his heart to see the younger’s heartbroken smiles when he said his sugar coated speech.  
  
“Soo?” Chanyeol nudges his shoulder. “You are not listening to me, are you okay?”  
  
He puts his glasses carefully on his desk before he lets Chanyeol envelop him in his warm embrace. Chanyeol hums softly, draws a circle pattern on his bare shoulder.  
  
“Something wrong?”  
  
He hesitates. “Nothing.”  
  
“Okay.” Chanyeol doesn’t seem to buy his lie, but relents anyway. “Look, I made this by myself.”  
  
Kyungsoo hums. Chanyeol is holding the glass ball with a toothy grin and when he looks closer there is tangled letters with carefully written numbers in between them. The curved words read “DKS 612 PCY”. He traces the letters with a fond smile.  
  
“What’s with the number?”  
  
Chanyeol seems thoughtful. “I don’t know, a date maybe.”  
  
“December sixth? Or June 2012?”  
  
“I have no idea,” Chanyeol says before laughing his head off.  
  
“Then why did you write them, silly.”  
  
But Kyungsoo can’t stop himself joining in Chanyeol’s laughter.  
  
  
  
  
  
“Chanyeol? You aren’t a product of my crazy imagination.”  
  
Chanyeol keeps strumming his – Seungsoo’s, actually – guitar. “No? I don’t think so.”  
  
“You're not a ghost neither are you a wizard.”  
  
“But I hope I am. Can you imagine me with a wand? Wingardium Leviosa!”  
  
“Are you even real?”  
  
“Yes? Why would I not be?”  
  
Kyungsoo ogles Chanyeol’s golden hair, he keeps it long enough to be tied in a bun. Kyungsoo plays with it carefully. The living room is quiet, save for Chanyeol's quiet humming to their favorite song. Kyungsoo hums too, lost in their comfortable dynamics. But then Chanyeol starts to sing with his deep voice, the sound reverberating through the air.  
  
And Kyungsoo can’t help to asks, “But how can you be here? And then you just vanish –”  
  
Chanyeol stops.  
  
Kyungsoo doesn’t stay and quickly retreats to the safety of his bedroom. He is not sure whether he wants to hear the answer or not. When he peeks out to search for some dinner, it’s already on the table. Along with post it note, scribbled with Chanyeol's handwriting.  
  
_Maybe I'm dreaming you. Maybe you're dreaming me; maybe we only exist in each other's dreams and every morning when we wake up we forget all about each other._  
  
Chanyeol is nowhere in sight.  
  
  
  
Chanyeol drags him outside while Kyungsoo follows with a fond smile because the taller man is so endearing. “Let’s go stargazing.”  
  
“The sun is literally on top of our heads, Yeol.”  
  
Chanyeol stares at him like he has gone crazy. “The Sun is a star is it not?”  
  
“Well, if you put it like that,” Kyungsoo whispers, the grass is soft beneath them. “I think you’re right.”  
  
Chanyeol smiles and Kyungsoo promptly closes his eyes.  
  
“Yeol?”  
  
“Hm?”  
  
He stalls, unsure. “Why do you keep dying your hair every year?”  
  
“Oh! You don't like it?!”  
  
“No! I'm just wondering why, you know? I’ve never seen it in black.”  
  
“We will see about that, I'm kinda curious about coloring it silver.” Chanyeol chuckles, his whole body moving with it.  
  
“Yeah?”  
  
“Uh-huh.”  
  
“Chanyeol?”  
  
“Kyungsoo.”  
  
“I love you.”  
  
There's no answer.  
  
But Kyungsoo doesn't have to open his eyes, he knows Chanyeol has gone.  
  
[He didn't know that Chanyeol would never come back.]  
  
  
  
2012  
  
Chanyeol never comes back.  
  
Kyungsoo waits, of course. But when weeks become months, he knows Chanyeol never will. The house feels too empty. The neighborhood feels empty too, with The Kims moving out after Junmyeon goes to university and Tao goes back to China. It’s lonelier than ever.  
  
His life feels empty.  
  
“The right people – the ones who really belong in your life – will come to you and stay.” Seungsoo nudges his shoulder before he sighs tiredly. “If they leave, then they're not meant to stay.”  
  
Kyungsoo ignores Seungsoo, still pretending that he never called him and weeps in misery. Screaming that Chanyeol is gone. That the glass ball is gone, too. And he knows there's no way Chanyeol will come back ever again now.  
  
“Soo? Your life is too precious for you to throw it away like this. Just go, okay? Maybe you'll find Chanyeol again at Uni.”  
  
Kyungsoo doubts that. “You don't understand, hyung.”  
  
Because, what if Chanyeol only appears in their house? What if, when he leaves this house, Chanyeol will forever be lost? But deep inside, he knows the real reason is not that. The real reason is he’s scared. This house holds so many precious memory of Chanyeol - of them together - and he can't bring himself to leave.  
  
“Well, then make me,” Seungsoo says stubbornly. “You keep weeping and won't talk to anyone, what has your life become?”  
  
“Nothing.”  
  
So Seungsoo persuades him, forces him. Tells him that maybe - just maybe - he will find Chanyeol again, if he just starts moving, starts living again. Maybe Chanyeol is waiting to be found right now. And if not, at least he tried, he can tell himself that he searched everywhere and that it’s not his fault.  
  
Kyungsoo just sobs.  
  
  
  
When June comes around, the memory of Chanyeol seems like faraway – fleeting memories. Kyungsoo lets go.  
  
[And life goes on.]  
  
  
  
2013  
  
Kyungsoo mets Jongdae on the fourth day of university, hitting off with him almost instantly and becoming a quite good friends. Jongdae has that kittenish mouth that makes his face look like he is always smiling.  
  
Not that Kyungsoo minds, his smile curled cutely like a feline. And when he sings, his eyebrows slanted, a trademark he said. Kyungsoo says this three months later, when he watch Jongdae performing in the park near the library.  
  
“Your face really does make you look like a cat.”  
  
Jongdae counters almost immediately, “And yours like an owl.”  
  
His eyes must be widening comically, because some passerby comment on those too. “I think he's right, your eyes are so big!”  
  
And that is how they meet Baekhyun. Funny and happy and a ray of sunshine Baekhyun. Later when the initial shock has faded Kyungsoo remembers their conversation going like this;  
  
“I know right?! I'm Kim Jongdae by the way, and that owl is Do Kyungsoo.”  
  
“I'm Byun Baekhyun. Freshman.”  
  
“Same with us! How about we get lunch together, Baekhyun-ssi?”  
  
Even years later, Kyungsoo still wonders why he agreed to being friends with the two of them when in the end, he was always the one who took care of the little things and every situation (can you imagine an owl taking care of ecstatic kitten _and_ puppy?).  
  
  
  
It's almost the end of semester when the accident happens. Kyungsoo has been listening to Jongdae and Baekhyun banter back and forth when he sees a mop of golden hair sticking out from the crowds. The person is wearing a headset around his neck, and walking away from him. It happens very fast, but when the taller turns round the corner, Kyungsoo runs.  
  
He runs for his life.  
  
“Chanyeol! Wait, Chanyeol!”  
  
He chases the figure that he believes is his Chanyeol even if he only saw the back of said man. He ran and ran, even when Jongdae and Baekhyun followed him, screaming his name.  
  
“Park Chanyeol! Wait for me, hey! Yeol-ah!” When he catches the taller’s wrist, he stops. “Chan–”  
  
Everything stops.  
  
“Kyungsoo! Wait!”  
  
It isn't his Chanyeol.  
  
Later, Kyungsoo remembers their conversation goes like this;  
  
“Kyungsoo! Who's Chanyeol?” Still panting, Baekhyun grabs his wrist tightly.  
  
“Is this Chanyeol?” Jongdae asks. “Are you Chanyeol?”  
  
Kyungsoo saw from his peripheral vision the taller man keeping mum, watching him with calculating eyes. And another man, with a mop of black hair and sleepy looking eyes smiles - dimples visible - gently at them, stands beside not-his-Chanyeol person.  
  
“Baekhyun? What's happening in here?”  
  
And Baekhyun gasps, “Yixing! I don't know either; I thought– we thought,” Baekhyun is side eying not-his-Chanyeol, “Are you by chance, Park Chanyeol?”  
  
“No. His name is Kris. Kris Wu.” Yixing answers. “What's happening?”  
  
“Nothing. Nothing, just – we'll be leaving now. Sorry for the discomfort.” Jongdae quips.  
  
They part ways, with Jongdae and Baekhyun leading him to his room. Kyungsoo is not talking to them, just blinking furiously, trying to stop the tears. After a while they stop talking and asking altogether. Jongdae sits at the desk while Baekhyun hugs him, murmuring something he can't quite remember.  
  
Another minutes passed before Jongdae talks, “Hey, I just want to tell you that I'm sorry? That he's not your Chanyeol.”  
  
And Kyungsoo cries then. He wails and everyone in that rooms starts to panic. It seems like the tears never stop flowing down his cheeks. He screams Chanyeol name until his throat is sore, cursing the said man – and the universe for this sick joke. He cries his heart out. He cries himself to sleep.  
  
When he wakes up next day, Jongdae and Baekhyun are hovering beside him extra close. But when he doesn't say anything, they understand then pretending as if yesterday never happened and never talk about the accident.  
  
[They never bring up Chanyeol’s name.]  
  
  
  
  
2014  
  
Jongdae likes Baekhyun. And vice versa. Kyungsoo doesn't understand why they're not just dating already. Jongdae has that mischievous glint in his eyes behind his calm demeanor while Baekhyun is literally a puppy, touchy but wise when needed. But both of them are _loud_ ; he thinks they're a perfect match made in heaven.  
  
“You're delusional. It will never happen.” Apparently, Jongdae disagrees.  
  
“Jongdae and me? Are you crazy?” And so does Baekhyun.  
  
“I see how you two look at each other. When you think nobody's looking,” He counters.  
  
This time, even if he told them at different place and different time, the answer is the same; “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”  
  
He thinks that the two of them are too deep in denial, so he let them be.  
  
  
  
“Baekhyun and his stupid ideas.”  
  
“At least he give you the hot one,” Jongdae chimes.  
  
“Don't talk about me like I'm not even here, please.”  
  
“Fuck off, Baek.”  
  
“Hey! Sehun is a nice guy even with a face like that! You just have to know him.”  
  
Kyungsoo scowls. “It's not him, Baek. I don't want to date, right now. Maybe not ever.”  
  
“Jongdae, did you hear that? I can't believe him!”  
  
“I can't believe you either!”  
  
  
  
After lots of guilt tripping and blackmailing, Kyungsoo is seated in the infamous vintage café near their university. He fidgets while his current date seems to be more uncomfortable than him.  
  
Kyungsoo licks his lips. “So.. you and Sehun?”  
  
“Uh.. Sehun is my flatmate, we've been best friend since forever.”  
  
“Okay.”  
  
“Look, I'm sorry, hyung. I know this makes you uncomfortable, but I swear I didn't know Sehun’s date was supposed to be you! He said there's this annoying hyung he has that keep forcing him to go and he really did agree at first, but college stuffs happen and – ”  
  
“It’s okay, Jongin. Really, I'm just surprised, that's all.”  
  
The silent lasts for about two minutes before the waiter asks for their order.  
  
Kyungsoo stares at the menu. “I'll have cheesecake and a vanilla milkshake. Jongin, what would – oh! They have bubble tea here, should we try them?”  
  
Kyungsoo still concentrating on the list when he hears a deep chuckle. His eyes meet with Jongin’s crinkling eyes and open mouthed laughter.  
  
He blushed without actually meaning to. “What is it?”  
  
“It's just – you still remember!”  
  
“Of course I do.”  
  
“Then you must be remember how you choked the first time you ever tried them!”  
  
Kyungsoo sputters. “You! I thought we agreed to never talk about that again,” He whines, embarrassed.  
  
The rest of day passed with Jongin's jokes and Kyungsoo's laughter, full of giddy feelings.  
  
  
  
2015  
  
“How's your law thing?”  
  
Kyungsoo snorts, but doesn't elaborate further. He's busy with these thick–only words and no pictures – books and in no condition to indulge Jongdae right now. That, and he knows Jongdae wouldn't appreciate his elaborate answers either.  
  
Glancing at the said man, he sees Jongdae's hair turning white from the snow. He considers telling him for a second before deciding not to and letting it melt. He chuckles secretly.  
  
“I'm still confused,” Jongdae says after a while, “It isn’t even your major, why did you take this class?”  
  
“It's required, Jongdae.”  
  
“That still doesn't make sense to me.”  
  
“It doesn’t to me either. Now if you please, I have this _law thing_ to study.”  
  
They fall into silence. And that's good, Kyungsoo really needs the silence right now to concentrate on his study if he wants to pass this class. He wonders briefly where Baekhyun is and not so briefly about what tonight’s dinner consists of. It takes exactly five minutes (he counts, because it was bound to happen) before Jongdae starts getting restless and begins tapping the table distractedly.  
  
“Can you shut up?”  
  
“Why? I didn't say anything,” He whines.  
  
“Can you _not_.“  
  
Jongdae bats his eyelashes. “Do you wanna build a snowman?”  
  
“Go away, Jongdae.”  
  
“Let's get some coffee then, Baekhyun has been busy with his puppy boyfriend.”  
  
Wait. “Baekhyun has a boyfriend?” When did that happen?  
  
“Yes, since fifteen minutes ago.” Jongdae answers the unspoken question with a tight lipped smile. “Too loud and tall and I suspect there's a three years old boy trapped on that body, if you ask me.”  
  
“Speak for yourself.”  
  
In the end, Kyungsoo relents. He can't get his work done anyway with Jongdae anywhere near him. And definitely not because he wants to prevent Jongdae mopping alone in the corner coffee shop. All the way to coffee shop, Jongdae starts telling the story about Baekhyun's puppy boyfriend who's majoring in the arts department.  
  
Kyungsoo can't help but reminisce about a particular puppy boy he knows.  
  
[In the end, Baekhyun's puppy love ended after exactly fifty five minutes. “It was mutual. We’re better off as friends.”]  
  
  
  
“Hyung?”  
  
“Yes, Jongin?”  
  
“Would you be my boyfriend?”  
  
  
  
  
“Yes.”  
  
  
  
2016  
  
"Okay, where should we go next?!"  
  
Kyungsoo giggles, hand warm in Jongin's hold. They've just finished watching a ballet recital, courtesy of Jongin. It's Sunday and Kyungsoo wonders if his habit of marathoning an anime and lazing around will stop forever. At least Jongin seems happy, he smiles.  
  
"I don't know," Kyungsoo answers. "Where do you wanna go?"  
  
"I want to go to a ballet recital, check." Jongin grins and turns to pinch Kyungsoo's cheek. "Now it's your turn."  
  
"I don't really know, how about we eat something? You said you wanted to try that chicken place near Uni, right?"  
  
Jongin smiles seems to falter a little but it’s gone before Kyungsoo can see it properly to check, replaced by a grin and ecstatic nodding. They just start walking again when Jongin's phone rings and startles them. Jongin quickly fishes it out of his pocket and distances himself, muttering, "It's Sehun."  
  
Kyungsoo shivers while watching Jongin’s retreating shoulder, the sidewalk feels just a little bit cold.  
  
  
  
“I can't believe we did this.”  
  
Baekhyun stares, “We did this, Dae,” he parrots.  
  
“I can't believe we did this!”  
  
Kyungsoo bristles, “Shush! If you keep screaming you might be graduating a year later, Jongdae.”  
  
Jongdae flinches, blinking furiously and groaning. He pouts at Kyungsoo before leaning closer to Baekhyun and keeping his mouth shut – listening to the speech and clapping at the appropriate time. Baekhyun’s still staring with glassy eyes and if Kyungsoo didn't know better, he might think that Baekhyun is crying (he’s not, it's just because he doesn't blink for two minutes – more or less).  
  
Staring at his best friends, he can't help but wonder about their future. They'll keep in contacting each other, right? When –if– Baekhyun and Jongdae grow up, will they still bicker and beton everything?  
  
“Okay, you're creeping me out. When will you blink, Baek?”  
  
“Don't talk to me, this is hard.”  
  
“Just blink then, I blinked already. You won!”  
  
“You little shit! Why didn't you tell me?!"  
  
Kyungsoo snickers.  
  
“Hey, I'm taller than you–” (“Only by five centimeters!”) “–and you can't talk to your boyfriend like that!”  
  
[Five minutes after Baekhyun broke up with said puppy boy and ten seconds after he knew what had happened, Jongdae throws himself at Baekhyun and confesses.]  
  
“Whatever big shit.”  
  
“You can't! I won’t allow it!”  
  
“I can, if said boyfriend is you.”  
  
[Baekhyun said yes.]  
  
“Anyway, you won. Where will we go then?”  
  
“Our celebratory vacation will be held at my grandmother's house!”  
  
“No way!”  
  
He smiles at himself when Baekhyun starts describing his grandmother's house (which is surrounded by mountains and forests) and Jongdae starts complaining. Personally, he's glad Baekhyun won, even if it's already January, the wind still howling and cold and he wouldn't want to be freezing in the 'ocean sea' like Jongdae had suggested.  
  
Baekhyun whispers, “I'm proud of us. We're amazing.”  
  
“Yeah, congratulations to us. For graduating from an institute of higher learning rather successfully,” He whispers back.  
  
Jongdae is smiling and he can see them holding hands under their robes, he quickly moves his gaze to another object. He's watching the crowds when he catches sight of a familiar person. Not just his back this time, looming over almost everyone, Kyungsoo can see his face, his smile – that same stupid smile he gave Kyungsoo years ago.  
  
His hair is dyed silver grey and somehow instead of looking old, Kyungsoo wants to touch him more, wondering if it feels as soft as how it looks. He shakes his head furiously, – ‘he's not here, your imagination is going wild’ – and takes a very deep breath.  
  
When he opens his eyes, Park Chanyeol is gone.  
  
  
  
2017  
  
(“You broke up with Jongin?! Why?!”  
  
“He likes someone else. And although he loves me, he never was in love with me.”  
  
“What?!”  
  
“Does that even make sense to you? Because to me, it doesn’t?”  
  
“But we’re still friends?”  
  
“But! You’re his first love!”  
  
“I think that's part of the problem, actually. He likes the old me, you know? His own version of me, not the real me.”  
  
“Is that why I saw him being gross with Oh Sehun in the hallway?”  
  
“How - and you are okay with that?”  
  
“I think I was never in love with him either.”)  
  
  
  
  
  
[And life still goes on.]  
  
  
  
2018, December 6th  
  
Kyungsoo grunts, drenched from the melting snow. He hopes the owner of this little cozy café won’t mind his current state. Trying to ignore that his steps leave wet patches on the linoleum, Kyungsoo picks the furthest chair in the corner. He sits down with a quiet sigh, feeling a funny fuzzy feeling and a little bothered. A hot chocolate is what he really needs right now – and a lack of stares if it’s possible.  
  
The only reason he comes to this particular café is because the display window is full of glass balls in a wide variety of sizes. He won’t admit it out loud, but he has a soft heart for glass balls. That’s why he picks the closest chair, so he can stare at them with ease. He orders a hot chocolate and cheesecake, so when a waiter gives him that, he doesn’t flinch.  
  
He doesn’t expect a towel though.  
  
From a tall raven haired man with a concerned look. “Hey, are you okay?”  
  
His breath hitches.  
  
And before he blacks out, he vaguely thinks that this scene is oddly familiar.  
  
  
  
He wakes up with a starts. “Chanyeol!”  
  
“Yes?!” The lump beside him moves. “Oh! You’re awake! Wait how do you know my name – do I know you?”  
  
Oh.  
  
“Okay, you’re freaking me out. I asked you this before, but you blacked out on me. Are you feeling okay?”  
  
There are so many possibilities out here: 1) This is all another twisted dream of his, 2) Chanyeol doesn’t remember him, 3) None of them is the right answer and 4) Kyungsoo is officially out of his mind.  
  
He stares. “This isn’t real.”  
  
“Excuse me?” The Chanyeol carbon copy seems alarmed.  
  
But fuck the universe. He misses Chanyeol. And this older version of his Chanyeol seems so real, and just _here_. Kyungsoo surges forward and hugs him close, cries openly in what he assumes must be somewhere inside the café.  
  
“This isn’t real,” He sobs. “But it's okay, just – don’t vanish, please. Not yet.”  
  
  
  
When Chanyeol asks, Kyungsoo blames every single thing that happened on his fever. “I’m not in my right mind,” he says.  
  
Chanyeol believes it.  
  
  
  
Almost a month has passed and Kyungsoo has become a daily customer at Chanyeol’s workplace. Because even without his ulterior motive, the cheesecake is actually really good. He becomes great friends with Chanyeol and it feels almost weird because this Chanyeol is so different from his Chanyeol but essentially the same.  
  
He’s waiting for Jongdae and Baekhyun for their monthly catch-up when there’s a commotion at the cashier. “Fuck! This is not good, abort mission, Dae!”  
  
Kyungsoo is a hundred percent sure Baekhyun is the source of it. “What? The hell, Baek? Why are you throwing me out?” But he isn’t sure why Chanyeol is involved.  
  
“Shit! Is Kyungsoo here yet? Dae?! I’m scared, what should we do?!” Baekhyun frantically trying to drag Chanyeol out from his spot. “Call Kyungsoo! Tell him uh, we’re in front of his flat! And this café is destroyed because of a sudden earthquake!”  
  
Jongdae seems busy with his phone. “Shut up, Baek! I’m trying to –”  
  
“But I'm already here,” he says while raising his eyebrow – he knows Baekhyun is scared when he does that. “Mind to telling me what this is all about?”  
  
Chanyeol whimpers a little, “Kyungsoo,” and then Baekhyun and Jongdae go crazy, “You two know each other?!”  
  
  
  
Long-short story, “Chanyeol is Baekhyun’s fifty-five-minute boyfriend,” Jongdae explains.  
  
Kyungsoo sits in his chair, with Jongdae and Baekhyun and Chanyeol – who is currently serving their drinks – listening to explanations that somehow start five years ago. Back to the unspoken accident that no one talks about but eventually has to.  
  
“So, we’ve been kind of um.. hiding Chanyeol from you?”  
  
Chanyeol squeaks, “You what?! I didn’t even know we went to the same uni, what the hell guys?”  
  
“Go back to work or we’ll tell your boss you’ve been slacking all the time,” Jongdae hisses.  
  
Kyungsoo agrees, but keeps mum because he knows the duo will feel guiltier if he does. The amount of radio silent Kyungsoo can conjure is quiet frightening and after experiencing it once, Baekhyun swears he never wants to go back (Jongdae learns too).  
  
“Look, Kyungsoo, I love you okay?” Baekhyun begins after Chanyeol leaves them and backtracks a little, “In a platonic way, obviously. So when I saw your breakdown over this Chanyeol guy, it really broke my heart.” (“And mine too,” Jongdae quips.) “Jongdae and I agreed that mentioning Chanyeol would only make you more heartbroken so we swore – that even if we did have this freakishly tall Park Chanyeol in our class – we would never mention him to you.”  
  
“That wasn’t a smart move.”  
  
Jongdae sighs. “We know. But we thought it was better to be safe than sorry. Baekhyun decided to stalk Chanyeol and ask him about you, he got nothing but a fifty five minute relationship.” (Baekhyun slaps him hard.) “So we waited for you to tell us the whole story, but you never did.”  
  
Kyungsoo feels slapped in the face. “I didn’t –”  
  
“It's okay, Soo, we’re not forcing you to or anything. We understand.”  
  
There’s no tears involved nor awkward hugs and pep talks, but Baekhyun’s and Jongdae's cautious smiles is a sweet gesture altogether. Kyungsoo gives them the five years delayed story.  
  
  
  
2019  
  
“Hyung? About the right people,” Kyungsoo whispers, “The one that belongs in my life, do you remember?”  
  
“Yeah? What about it?”  
  
“You said if they leave they're not the right one, yeah?”  
  
It feels weird, talking to Seungsoo face to face like this. Without the static sound from his phone speaker or watching the pixels move through the screen. They're sitting quietly now, Kyungsoo eyes raking through Seungsoo photographs.  
  
“But what if they come back?”  
  
There's a pregnant pause, like someone stopped the clock and everything freeze in it’s place. Kyungsoo raises his head and meets with Seungsoo’s smile.  
  
“Then they're yours to keep.”  
  
  
  
2020  
  
"Stay away from my fiancé, bitches."  
  
Kyungsoo rolls his eyes before letting out a dramatic sighs. "Really, Baek? That video is from when Jongdae graduated from elementary school."  
  
"Elementary school," Chanyeol adds between snickers.  
  
Baekhyun doesn't care and keeps commenting about how Jongdae looks good in glasses and when Jongdae's high school graduation shown, how that teacher keeps touching Jongdae's butt ("I mean, I know no one can resist Jongdae's ass-" "Just shut up, Baek!").  
  
They leave Baekhyun's flat when night finally comes and the pizzas they order is resting peacefully in their stomachs. Baekhyun whines and clings to them ("Stop whining, you sound a lot like Jongdae!") and complaining about how lonely he will be. Baekhyun only stops when his phone rings, his face lighting up instantly when he sees the caller ID.  
  
"He must be landing already! That stupid business trip- Jongdae!" Baekhyun waves at them before he closes the door with a bang.  
  
"Such a friend we have." Chanyeol smiles fondly.  
  
They ended sprawled on Kyungsoo's unmade bed, staring at the ceiling which full of stars painted by Chanyeol. Kyungsoo’s head rests comfortably on Chanyeol's arm, _before Chanyeol_ wriggles free and sits with his back against the wall.  
  
"Have I ever told you about the possibility you might be my soulmate?" Chanyeol asks.  
  
"Every single day."  
  
"Kyungsoo, there's a serious talk we need to have right now."  
  
Kyungsoo sits too, aware of how Chanyeol’s eyes are steady on him. "Is this about how weird I am?"  
  
Because honestly, Kyungsoo has lost count of how many times he started a conversation with Chanyeol with, "Do you remember when we-" and talks about things that happened before Chanyeol or how he somehow knows every little tidbit about the taller man.  
  
"No! You're not weird?!" Chanyeol looks stricken.  
  
"I'm glad. So what's it about?"  
  
“This might be weird, but hear me out, okay?”  
  
And Chanyeol tells him a story about a lonely boy and a glass ball. Retelling his forgotten dream, about a boy with wide curious eyes whose lips shaped like a heart. Chanyeol tells him that magic really did happen, sometime.  
  
The room is silent for a moment.  
  
"Want to hang out and annoy each other for the next few years?"  
  
Kyungsoo hums. "Are you proposing?"  
  
"Dunno, I might be."  
  
"There's another story." Kyungsoo takes Chanyeol’s hand into his. "About another lonely boy. Want to hear that?"  
  
Chanyeol pouts. "Will you marry me or not?"  
  
"Yes. Not today right?"  
  
"No, next year." Chanyeol lays on the bed again, hands resting comfortably on Kyungsoo's waist.  
  
"Good, let's get married next year. In June, how does that sound?"  
  
"Sounds amazing. Now let's hear the other version of the story."  
  
And Kyungsoo tells Chanyeol _everything_.  
  
  
  
Epilogue.  
  
Chanyeol was humming a catchy tune from his favorite girl group when he saw the glinting in the dark corner of his grandparent’s storage room. Upon further inspection, he found a glass ball. Pristine white with sleek wood securing it in place.  
  
"Grandpa! Look what I found!"  
  
He’s meet with a smile as an answer. "Let me tell you a story about a lonely boy."  
  
Once upon a time, there's a lonely boy. He has a loving family, a set of helpful friends and yet he is still lonely. One day though, through a commotion of such, he found a magic glass ball which was full of happiness and chased all the loneliness away.  
  
"A magic glass ball? Like mine?!"  
  
"Yes, it contains joy but more importantly it helps you find your soulmate."  
  
Chanyeol can only stare in awe.  
  
  
  
It’s a week after that, when he inspects the glass ball alone in his bedroom that _something_ actually happens. He had caught a cold and could do nothing except toy with everything within arm’s reach and that was getting boring after a few minutes.  
  
He sighs to the glass ball, “It's getting lonely.”  
  
And then he sneezes.  
  
When he opens his eyes, the glass ball is nowhere in sight. He blinks, confused. There is no one that suddenly emerges from the air to keep him away from loneliness. Nothing unusual happens except the glass ball that vanishes from his hold.  
  
He waits for the glass ball to return the next day and every week after that, but it never does. Instead, he keeps dreaming about a boy with heart shaped lips and big wondering eyes. It gets fuzzy when he tries to recall what the dream is actually about, so he stops questioning it altogether.  
  
And when the glass ball finally does come back, years after - carved with numbers and letters - appearing in front of his eyes inside his locker at school - he doesn’t question that either.

**Author's Note:**

> talk to me on [Twitter!](https://twitter.com/ininawaa?s=09)


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